Mariano José Romero Arregin. Powered by Blogger.

UNTIL THE END...

by - February 04, 2022

A coffee with "mi abuela"

Saying goodbye is never easy, and right now, the pain of parting feels overwhelming. I still haven't fully comprehended that I will never see my beloved grandmother by my side again. Writing has always provided solace in my life, but today, even words fail to offer catharsis or ease the profound sorrow I feel. My grandmother held an immense significance in my life. She was a mirror in which I saw my own reflection—a person who fought relentlessly until the very end, never surrendering and never letting her guard down.

The Unbearable Farewell:
Expressing my thoughts and emotions is incredibly challenging, and bidding farewell is the last thing I desire. Within me, a haunting feeling persists, a sense that I could have done more to ensure her final days were filled with peace and less trauma. My grandmother radiated vitality and resilience—a woman of extraordinary bravery, unafraid of the circumstances life presented her.

A Guardian Angel:
When I was 18 years old, my grandmother opened her doors to me, allowing me to study in a new city. Looking back, I realize that my attempts to reciprocate her kindness pale in comparison to what she did for me. No words can adequately express my gratitude to her. Despite our occasional disagreements, she remained the kindest person I knew. I doubt she ever complained about me to anyone, even when I undoubtedly deserved it.

My Grandmother's Unwavering Support:
My grandmother always had my back, unwavering in her support. This statement holds true, and mere words cannot capture the depth of my admiration for her. I am left with numerous unanswered questions, my prayers seemingly unheard, but this is not unfamiliar territory.

The memories we shared together bring solace, such as the one captured in the attached photograph. It was taken after an immunotherapy session, during the hours we spent waiting to go home. This image is not random; it represents her strength, as she insisted on joining me for a cup of coffee after enduring a day filled with dreadful medical procedures.

Farewell, Grandma:
I love you, Grandma, and I carry the weight of knowing that I could have done more. I vividly remember the last nearly unintelligible word you spoke to me during that final ambulance ride. Thank you for allowing me to dry that last tear.

In honoring my grandmother's memory, I find solace in acknowledging her unwavering courage and strength. While the pain of loss is profound, the love and cherished moments we shared will forever remain in my heart. As I navigate the grief of her departure, I am determined to carry her spirit forward, embracing her unwavering determination and resilience. Farewell, my beloved grandmother. You will always be with me, inspiring me to live a life of purpose and bravery.

Die Dinge im Leben sind oft unerklärlich. Das Schicksal spielt uns immer einen sehr tückischen Streich und im Laufe der Stunden, Tage und Jahre beginnen die Wunden zu heilen, aber ich möchte, dass du weißt, dass ich dich bis zu meinem letzten Atemzug weiterhin mit all meiner Kraft lieben werde.

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